soulchaser

Have you ever fallen out a bucket half way up a building causing your collarbone to snap into numerous pieces, leaving you bruised and bound and unable to move and with nothing to do but wonder about what it all means until you realise that something's missing and you decide that a formal education will be that something and so you spend a year broken and broke and not trying very hard to pretend that you care about what all these people think about something that you realise doesn't matter very much and you're paying through the nose for a piece of paper that you know won't pay you back and so the whisket starts pouring the lonely nights and the drunken fights and this inescapable rite of passage is old and stale and you've done this all before and so you look for distraction and as ever it finds you like lightning strikes the planets pulse and suddenly you're alive again and thrive again a shaker in the hive again and you're at your limit with success as your meaning and the stress is a drug that you hate but you love for what it is which is compensation for the endorphines and adrenaline so instead you crave this poison and yet still something's missing something's not quite right, the same thing as before but you're committed now no chance for change to shed your skin but that won't last for long because what you've built was built in haste with no real care because even then you knew that it was only distraction, inaction and reaction and the longing for meaning competes with many others but is irresistable and like a bather in the sea is moved along the shore each time he dips every time you land you're further along the bank and soon everything will have gone again the embers almost dead again and off to pastures new again to build the next fire, bigger, stronger, to last this time, this is the one, this one will make it, this fire will burn